I don’t think I want to go to that party.
oh grandma what a big booty u have
all the better 2 steal ur man with, my child
i thought eyelashes were meant to keep shit out of your eye but half the time theres anything in my eye its a fucking eyelash
Listen, I don’t think you’re an asshole who thinks it’s funny to do something that women find scary. You’ve been raised to think that this sort of stuff is all in good fun. Not by your parents necessarily, but by culture. You’ve grown up in a country where a Super Bowl commercial for Audi suggests that girls your age actually like it when a guy they don’t really know grabs and forces a kiss on them. (Seriously - they won’t like this.) You’ve been raised in a culture that positions women as existing just for sex, for humiliation, for objectification.
So please understand that I don’t blame you for partaking in the only kind of culture you’ve ever know. At least, I don’t blame you yet. Because here’s the thing - if you didn’t realize before that this kind of stuff is harmful and hurtful to women, now you do. So think of this as a chance to make a decision about what kind of man you’re going to be.
As you continue to grow up, you’re going to have plenty of opportunities (too many) to laugh at women’s pain, embarrassment or the sexual harassment and assault we face. These moments will define you. Will you laugh along? Share a video, like a status, laugh a joke? Or will you say ‘no’, tell a friend that’s a fucked up thing to say, and walk away?” — To My Male Relatives on Facebook Who ‘Like’ Sexism (via albinwonderland)
don’t be too clingy
don’t be such a ‘girl’
be a woman
but be hairless like a child
don’t wear skimpy outfits
don’t be such a ‘slut’
but take it off when i ask
don’t assert yourself
don’t be such a ‘bitch’
be nice to me
but don’t be a fucking doormat
don’t be ignorant
don’t be such a ‘bimbo’
but don’t argue your opinion with me
don’t wear make-up ever
don’t be so ‘insecure’
but don’t complain if i don’t like it
meaning to type ‘yeah’ and accidentally putting ‘yeha’
because i was thinking about my body and everything i’ve been taught about it
because we learn, so early, what we’re capable of, what we’re worth
i was thinking about pregnancy and mothers.
when you’re a little girl, you learn: girls can get pregnant. girls can have babies.
we’re capable of becoming pregnant from around the age of 11. and it looms. we’re capable of something which, if it were to happen too soon or too late or unwed or still-at-home or working-on-a-career, would hurt our value as a person.
mothers are treated like dirt. i don’t understand why this is true. young mothers are treated like dirt. there is still the possibility for a change of perception if you’re at just the right age, just the right color and background. black and brown mothers of any age and any circumstance are treated like animals, like vermin. i don’t understand this cruelty.
to know, from a young age, that what your body does is filthy, unwanted, wrong, a bad idea. to know that when you’re not pregnant and you start to bleed, you’re filthy. to know that when you get pregnant, you’re a burden. to know that if you were to forsake your function and never get pregnant, you’d be worthless.
to know, when you’re a young girl, that your body is a political battlefield. if you have a child, you’re a part of it. if you abort, you’re a part of it. if you’re sexually active, you’re a part of it. if you exist, you’re a part of it.
to feel, when you’re a young brown girl, that your body is not worth fighting over for anything.
to feel, if you have a non-functioning uterus or no uterus, that you are not, that you are less than, you are off the map.
i don’t understand why everything is structured against motherhood. it doesn’t make any sense to me. it is used to define women so much, and it vilifies women so much. i don’t understand queer people that refer to “breeders” with a sneer. i don’t understand how “child support” and EBT/WIC is talked about in public discourse. mothers should have unqualified support. women should have unqualified support. why is birth control and abortion and adoption even an issue ?
there is a lack of financial support. a lack of community support. a village is supposed to raise a child. we vilify single mothers while kicking them out of our houses.
how is a girl supposed to exist in this world? how is a brown baby girl supposed to infer any kind of sense of value or worth for herself?
i was thinking about my body last night, and i cried. i was thinking, what if i was pregnant. what if i had a baby girl. how soon would she learn? how fully would she understand — what she would be capable of, and what the world would think of her? how much they would love her with her clothes off? how much they would hate her all the same? and i cried.